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Monday, August 16th, 2004
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Welllll, so far NCF is fucking awesome. I've been here 24 hours and already had sooo much fun. I can't seem to locate my mailing address at the moment, but i will post it soon. My phone # is 941-360-5077. My roomate's name is Jessie. I live in room 112, 1st court, second story. Room is pretty damn big for a dorm. I don't have a balcony, but I have a suicide ledge which is kinda like a balcony minus the balcony part. It's a sliding glass window/door the entire length of one wall that opens, but there is a cement wall/railing about 3 inches beyond the glass. But there's this gorgeous tree right outside my window. Well I will post my addy once I find it, but for now I'm off for the President's Welcome at the Sudakoff center. Peace out all, call me, visit me, see ya later.
P.S.- NCF rocks.
P.P.S.- the addy is......
Zach Evers
5700 N.Tamiami Trail box 724
Sarasota, FL 34243-2179
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Comments: Read 6 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, August 14th, 2004
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Well, tomorrow I leave for Sarasota. NPR, you've been good to me, I'll be back. Everyone who reads this, I'll post all my info (phone #, address....) once I get there and get all squared away. And anyone who wants -must- come visit, just gimme a call. I'm only like an hour and a half away in Sarasota. Well, New College of Florida, I'll see you in the morning.
Peace
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, June 16th, 2004
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well, I haven't updated in a hell of a long time, so I figured I'd start again. Maybe I'll keep better track of it this time. I've gotta go to work in a few, but I'll post this crazy comment thing in here to start.
Who's been commenting in your journal?
These statistics were generated using the LJ Stats Web Interface by ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=88.8) mpnolan. Original idea from scrapdog's LJ Comment Stats Wizard.
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Comments: Read 5 or Add Your Own.
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Sunday, August 24th, 2003
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last cigarette: Camel Turkish Royal- 10:25
last car ride: home from work
last kiss: (shhhhhh);-)
last good cry: last night w/ lauren while we were listening to sad songs
last library book checked out: dunno, i either borrow books from friends or buy them
last movie seen: The Dangerous Lives of Alter Boys
best scene: When he reads "Tiger, Tiger" by William Blake at his friend's funeral...watch the movie and you'll understand
last book read: The Poisonwood Bible
last food consumed: Tostidos
last phone call: Cassie, to tell me she would take Adam and Lauren to St.Pete
last tv show watched: family guy
last time showered: ......I'm a dirtbag, friday morning
last shoes worn: Adidas Specialz
last cd played: Radiohead - "Hail to the Thief"
last item bought: pack of cigarettes
last downloaded: Travis - "Sing"
last annoyance: work
last disappointment: .....not even gonna say
last soda drank: Dr. Pepper (drinking it now)
last thing written: "Dr. Pepper (drinking it now)"
last key used: The 4-cylinders of Doom's key (my beat-up '91 celica)
last words spoken: "shhhh, listen to the silence"
last sleep: 5 hours last night
last im: a little bit ago
last weird encounter: somehow ran in into someone online from Ocala (old home) and talked to them about people we both knew and such (Ocala is -really- small)
last time amused: when the clock struck 2am and I thought it was so much earlier
last time wanting to die: middle school maybe? i focus more on living now
last song listened to: "Dust in the Wind" - Kansas
last time hugged: my friend Lindy before i took off from work
last time resentful: ....not gonna talk about this either
last chair sat in: really uncomfortable computer chair I need to find a replacement for
last underwear worn: boxers
last shirt worn: my cool kid hippie shirt
last time dancing: earlier today at work
last poster looked at: i don't know
last show attended: -might- have been allister and count the stars
last webpage visited: before lj, www.slashdot.org
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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I was sitting on the back porch at my good friend Adamjohnfarrell's house, when I witness something incredible...and it is now my muse. We went out back to watch the early Summer thunder storm come in. we sat down a few minutes before it reached us, so when you look one way there was blue skies and white clouds, and you look the other way, and it's this swirling mass of dark grey and black clouds. And right then was when I realised the energy in nature. Then the first bolt of lightning struck, and they didn't stop. One after the other, all followed by a deep rolling rumble of thunder. Soon after, I noticed that it was raining on one side of the house, but not yet on the other, and it was so beautiful just watching the storm move over us in such a defined line. There was this intensity everywhere, all of it from one source, all of it from that storm. That's when I realised that there is a life in everything, just not the kind of life most people think of. Life is defined on three planes of existance: Physical, Mental, and Spiritual; in that order from least enlightened to most. It struck me that there was so much power in something so ultimately innocent. That no matter what the storm does, it is completely benevolent...if you're struck by lightning, it's not because it wanted to strike you, it just happened. As I thought more, I realised that pure benevolence could only be achieved through a lack of existance on the Mental plane(if you cannot think you cannot judge). Which means that storms and other acts of pure nature are the most potent connections between the Physical and Spirtitual planes because they are unimpeded by the hinderence of a central plane. Everything starts a new beginning after a storm. Seeds grow into new plants, which provide a more abundant source of oxygen in their initial growth spurt, therefore decreasing air pollution by drowning out the old with the fresh. So I thought to myself; if storms are a connection between the physical and spiritual world, and they are characterized by cleansing and rejuvination in the physical, why not the spiritual as well? My point was further proved (to myself anyways) when my mood and energy were feeling wonderful, whereas previously they had not. I was overwhelmed with this complete and total serenity, even in the midst of this, then violent, and amazing thunderstorm. The intensity had been steadily increasing through my epiphany. Lightning was beginning to hit closer so the thunder was louder, the frequency of lightning had increased as well. Then in an instant lightning struck no more than two houses down from us. It was so close we were left with that tinny taste you get in your mouth and that funny feeling you get in your teeth after you touch your tongue to a 9-volt battery or chew on tin-foil. And I once again found it awe-inspiring the amount of power in such an innocent and benevolent force.
After the stormhad died down some, I went outside to watch more from the front of the house, and I looked up and it was back to half crystal blue, and half dark grey skies. Except now everything seemed to be in a mood of awakening and rebirth, rather than one of a drab shutting down.
Life is so amazing, it can reach out and touch you at the most unexpected time. Don't let that moment slip away without a memory made....
Peace and Love to you all.
~Zach~
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Comments: Read 11 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, June 11th, 2003
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So, it's pretty funny when someone IM's you to call you a "coward" and then signs off. I wonder if she realises that by signing off before I had a chance to prove her wrong she has, in effect, performed an act of cowardice. And as for me being a coward...I'm not the one who runs from all my problems into the arms of someone else I can attempt to control...over and over and over and over again, regardless of whether or not I'm in a relationship at the time or not.
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Comments: Read 12 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, March 19th, 2003
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| Time: | 11:13 pm. |
| Mood: |  distressed. |
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Hello, and welcome to war. I'm George "Cowboy" Bush, I'll be leading you on this tour through death, mayhem and destruction.Afterwards, u can stop by the giftshop and pick up some free oil....
War...We're at war everyone. Bush is a Warmonger and should be condemned to Hell by his deity of choice popularity. Not only is he waging war for oil, but he's blatently lying to us about it, and then trying to make it seem as if he's liberating a nation of people who are, in reality, holding Anti-American rallies. Jesus, if you're going to lie about something like that, at least be smart about it and suppress the media so are newspapers aren't plastered with pictures of Iraqis holding Pro-Sadam banners and placcards. And apparently, we have 35 other nations backing us now, mostly because they are afraid of the reprocussions of not siding with the strongest (not necessarily the best) military in the world.
Fuck you George Bush.
Fuck you "America".
Fuck you Iraqi crude.
Fuck you bombs.
Fuck you war.
I Love you all, and all I want is peace.
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Comments: Read 13 or Add Your Own.
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| Time: | 11:04 pm. |
| Mood: | Content, despite hating Bush. |
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C: how about we move somewhere where no one will ever find us and it will just be the two of us and we'll never have to interact with soceity again?
C: or the world
C: or stupid presidents
xDistorteDreams: ok
xDistorteDreams: works for me
xDistorteDreams: where do u live, I'll pick you up right now
xDistorteDreams: we'll just drive
C: thank you
xDistorteDreams: sell the car, buy a boat
xDistorteDreams: go to some island
C: that would be so nice
xDistorteDreams: or just float around on the ocean
C: just two people and the solitude of the world
C: ignorant of obscentities of war and violence
C: we'd be so content
xDistorteDreams: paradise found
xDistorteDreams: wear nothing but holly leaves ;-)
xDistorteDreams: no, it would be great though
C: it would be great
C: screw the holly leaves we'd be completely naked
xDistorteDreams: can you imagine some of the things you could hink about, how well we would know each other
xDistorteDreams: naked works
C: we could just tell eachother stories all day
C: and watch every single sunrise and sunset
xDistorteDreams: i ithnk that would be the best part, waking up and just watchin the sun rise in absolute silence
xDistorteDreams: sitting next to each other on the deck of our little boat
C: it sounds like utopia
C: the background to our lives would be the lapping waves, instead of crass commercials
xDistorteDreams: it sounds like the garden
C: and instead of advertisements, we'd just see the horizon
xDistorteDreams: no more listening to ignorant peoples opinions
xDistorteDreams: just complete harmony with everything
C: yes
C: harmony
C: i feel really peaceful right now...haha
xDistorteDreams: me too
xDistorteDreams: and i wasn't before I started talking to you
C: i wasn't either
xDistorteDreams: wow, we just went on our little boat together, was anything else in your head besides us together on the ocean on our little boat?
C: not at all
C: that was a really strange/beautiful experience
xDistorteDreams: it was
xDistorteDreams: we should do it
C: yes we should
C: i don't have a boat though :-(
xDistorteDreams: neither do i
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, January 22nd, 2003
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[ x ] Spell your first name backwards - Yrahcaz
[ x ] The story behind your LJ user name - some witty creation of a mind with way too much time to just sit around and think of witty things
[ x ] Are you a lesbian - nope
[ x ] 4 words that sum you up - music, movies, friends, life
DESCRIBE YOUR
[ x ] Wallet - 100% duct tape
[ x ] Toothbrush - one of those wicked cool spinning ones
[ x ] Jewelry worn daily - black rubber bracelets, plugs/spacers in ear, cool hemp bracelet I made myself
[ x ] Pillow cover - one's black, the other is white and black checkerboard
[ x ] Blanket - a chanelle one my mommy got me for x-mas a couple years ago, and this knitted one I've since I was about 2
[ x ] Underwear - right now? white and gray striped boxers, vertical stripes (they're slimming)
[ x ] shoes - black chucks with cool quotes, or black boots
[ x ] CD in stereo right now - Radiohead- "OK Computer"
[ x ] What you are wearing now - dirty work clothes, bleck
[ x ] Hair - brown, and long
WHO or WHAT (was/is/are)
[ x ] In my head - janis joplin songs, and the fact that jackie says I'm cool :-D
[ x ] Wishing - for love
[ x ] Person you wish you could see right now - jackie
[ x ] Is next to you - my cd's
[ x ] Some of your favorite movies - oh god.... memento, dangerous lives of alter boys, american beauty, the crow, REsevoir Dogs, nightmare before christmas, pulp fiction, Amelie, Labyrinth...this could be a while, so I'm gonna stop
[ x ] Something you're looking forward to in the upcoming month - developing photos myself *squee*
[ x ] The last thing you ate - chicken courdon bleu
[ x ] Something that you are deathly afraid of - not finding love again
[ x ] Do you like candles - i love them
[ x ] Do you like incense - oh yea
[ x ] Do you like the taste of blood - doesn't bother me, mind you, I mean like sucking your thumb if you accidentally poke it or something
[ x ] Do you believe in love - I believe love is thwe reason for life
[ x ] Do you believe in soul mates - definately
[ x ] What do you want done with your body when you die - I dunno, but I am putting a clause in my will that no one gets a cent unless "another one bites the dust" by queen is played at my funeral
[ x ] Who is your worst enemy - no one really
[ x ] If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be - i want a chameleon
[ x ] What is the latest you've ever stayed up - 3 days, and i won a bet too
[ x ] Ever been to Belgium - nope
[ x ] Can you eat with chopsticks - i do whenever I get oriental food
[ x ] What's your favorite coin - quarter, don't ask me why?
[ x ] What are 5 cities you wouldn't mind relocating to - San Francisco, New York, Seattle, San Diego, New Orleans
[ x ] What's something that you wish people would understand - who I see myself as in my head
[ x ] What's something you wish you could understand better - everything
[ x ] Anyone you miss that you haven't seen in a long time - my best friend in Ocala Tiff
1) Last dream: I think I was eating huge graham crackers, but that's all I remember, i was watching something while eating them too
3) Last kiss: kristen mooneyhan today, she kissed me on the cheek cuz I gave her a dollar, she's such a sweetie
4) Last good cry:i think yesterday, when i was thinking about someone
11) Last Crush: not telling :-X
13) Last TV show watched: well, it was a movie on TV, some strange early nicolas cage movie where he went insane and thought he was a vampire, it was pretty funny
14) Last Item Bought: gas for my car
17) Last CD played: Radiohead- "OK Computer"
18) Last downloaded: Lou Reed - "Take a walk on the Wild
19) Last annoyance: work
20) Last disappointment: that work was long today, wah
27) Last IM: AlmostFreeSpirit, Jackie Wang
30) Last weird encounter: Lisa coming up to give me a hug and punching me in the stomach
31) Last Store Shopped at: ummm, is Denny's a store?
33) Last time amused: when i was talking to jackie
34) Last time wanting to die: yesterday night
35) Last time in love: if you know me, you know the answer to this question
36) Last time hugged: today
39) Last chair sat in: this one by the computer
43) Last shirt worn: besides work shirt, my cool tight black one....does anyone besides me see the irony in this statement?
46) Last time dancing: the other day when I was cheering up Amy, we danced to the Beatles baby, oh yes, ph yes
48) Last concert attended: It's been too long, but I WILL see The Faint if they come
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Comments: Read 8 or Add Your Own.
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Saturday, September 28th, 2002
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Wednesday, September 25th, 2002
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As I once again try to piece together the shards of my broken heart, I realise that parts are missing, and they don't fit back together quite right. I know why the emptiness is still there in my chest...
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Monday, September 23rd, 2002
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He he, I'm over at my house (reva's) eating grean bean casserole that looks like vomit. It tastes yummy though. I am also being forced to update my lj in a trade for Kristen to eat some of the vomit/casserole. he he. she just finished eating all of it. I'm having a good time over here today. We're all acting really strange, but I love it. anywho, I had to write an essay today for college, 500 words, easy stuff. bah blah back shit. typey typey typey. I'm going to go spend the last half hour of time I have over here before I have to go to class hanging out with my buddays. buh byes.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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Friday, September 13th, 2002
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| Time: | 3:33 pm. |
| Mood: |  contemplative. |
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"All I ever wanted, All I ever needed,
Is here, in my arms.
Words are very unnecessary,
They can only do harm."
Music is so perfect, in every way. No matter what kind of music it is, how bad it is, how loud it is, it all shares one common bond: Emotion. Any music that is real music is absolutely bursting with emotion. Only one other thing in the world shares this emotion: you. That is why music is so important. It shares the one thing that makes us alive. With music we can relate, unite, cry, scream, vent, and most important of all feel. There are those songs that just instill and evoke this deep and overflowing sense of (insert emotion here) inside your heart that you just can't help but share. Music is Love, music is pain, music is laughter and good times and friends and tears, sleepless nights and mid-day mornings. Music is life, and mine would be worthless without it.
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Comments: Read 3 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, August 21st, 2002
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Me and ryan had some drama the other day. We talked about it and worked things out, i really hope that it didn't affect our friendship any, I really think ryan is a great person, and a great friend. I love ya too ryan :-) well I have that whole 'school' thing I've got to do soon, so I'm off. Thank you for talking to me about the things that were bothering you ryan, I hate it when I hurt people, but sometimes I don't know I am. If I am hurting anyone else who is reading this...please talk to me about it, it's the only way I'll know to stop...
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Comments: Read 1 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, July 31st, 2002
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Today wasn't very exciting. Spent most of the afternoon running errands and doing chores around the house. It left me with a lot of thinking to myself time though. While triffling through a half subconcious corner of my mind brought about by sheer menial tasks and ungodly bouts of insomnia, I uncovered one of lifes little fuck you's.
Every small child is told that life's most important aspect is to dream. Dreams can really come true, we're told. They urge us to never stop reaching for our dreams and to never give up. And everyone is so happy as children. No worries, just your dreams to guide you into your future. But so soon into that future, they tell us our dreams are too grandeier and that they are to be replaced by 'goals'... realistic ones at that. fuck goals, they only get in the way of what you really want to do. Goals cripple anything that anyone could accomplish in the way of advancement. They are set much too low. Dreams live in the clouds, go dance with them.
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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tonight was amazing. thad, vincent, reva, ryna, and ashley went with me to Chronic Insomnia to see Natural Blend again. Great show once again. they're great guys in that band. When they took their break, we all went for a walkaroo, which turned into a standaroundaroo. But ashley thad and I ended up sitting on the hood of my car, looking up at the sky trying to find just 1 star. We finally found one, and as I took a drag off of my clove, I told everyone that I wished this moment would last forever. I wish it would have, everything just felt right. like nothing could ever come between any of us. I wrote something on the wall in front of that parking lot "Make every moment, the one you want to last forever..." I think I will leave you all with that. Have a goodnight and a greater morning.
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Comments: Read 2 or Add Your Own.
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Wednesday, July 3rd, 2002
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| Time: | 2:04 am. |
| Mood: |  artistic. |
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I'm exceptionally artistic!
Find your soul type at kelly.moranweb.com.
Virtues: You look for immense creativity and individuality in people, including yourself. You're not happy with anything less than brilliant, and you focus on being expressive. You value energy, liveliness, and upbeat personalities, but you're not supportive of moodiness when you yourself can be unreliably moody. Seeking activity, you like the bustle of business but need the secluded atmosphere of a studio or private corner.
Aspirations: You feel the need to express your talents, whether it be through writing, drawing, singing, dancing, composing, performing, or photographing. While you strive to ever improve your work, you want to display it as soon as possible when your impatience kicks in. You want to be a prodigy but you might not have the means right at your fingertips. Trust me, do NOT move to New York to do it. Yeesh!
Quirks: Conformists bother you because of their lack of individuality. You're often late or unreliable. You're showy and refuse to share the spotlight. You only tell little white lies. You worm your way into the hearts of others, but be careful; some people despise the show-offs.
Factors: Surround yourself with activity and you'll always have material to work with. Involve friends and family in your projects so they don't feel like envious outsiders.
Future: Show business or not, you'll settle down happily if you're among those who appreciate your natural talents and desire to perform. Don't stay in one place too long, and don't be too hasty in defining your relationships. Who are you to judge what only time will tell?
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Comments: Add Your Own.
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Thursday, June 27th, 2002
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| Time: | 12:34 am. |
| Mood: | artistic. |
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I decided to update tonight, I haven't felt like it recently. I took some pictures tonight, I like my new pic. It's a poem I wrote a while ago on a scrap of notebook paper, It fell out of my actual journal tonight, and brought back memories. I decided that it was about time to put it into finality. I picked up my quill and began to scribble it out onto bound page in my journal. Some of the dark specks are ink drops, others are tears. Memories *sigh* they're so lovely. Before anybody becomes intently curious, and tries unsuccesfully to zoom in and read what it says, I will save you the time....
The night, so cold, but we are warm.
Silent tension screams a panic stricken cry.
Our fingers caress as pale skin peeks from beneath,
Too nervous to show, too curious to shy.
Hearts race through a single chest,
As hushed sighs rise to a gentle moan.
Sweet whispers quiver through the broken dark
As the night becomes our own.
The night, so still, but we are warm.
Insecure and frail, I touched your face.
"Never forget," you spoke in tender voice.
How could I, in Love's embrace?
---
*sigh* things happen, I guess, and that's all that anyone can do to deal with it, admit that you have really no power or control over anything. Some people try to fool themselves of this by manipulating and toying with others. Some realise it and simply give up. I have simply accepted the fact that I cannot control most events that occur. And it is the truth, and it puts me in a unique situation where I hardly get angry, and I hardly make enemies. I like the perspective I have on things, sometimes it gets lost, but it returns eventually. Not many people can deal with it though. no. Many people have to find someone to place the blame on, whereas I hardly see blame, I see misunderstandings on the part of both parties. Not many people can accept a situation without blame.
Well, I will try and update again sometime soon, oh, my interests have also been updated in case anyone was interested, goodnight all.
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Comments: Read 4 or Add Your Own.
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| Time: | 3:51 pm. |
| Mood: |  cheerful. |
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no more pencils,
no more books,
no more teachers' dirty looks
that was an original poem, i made that up all by myself... he he
Well, today was finally hte last day of school, no more tests, no more homework, no more getting up early....THANK GOD!! Well, I'm off to work (i know i know, gotta work on the last day of school? I'm supposed to be out partyin' and livin' it up.)toodleoo.
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Comments: Read 10 or Add Your Own.
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indescribable.
annoyed.
depressed.